Latest News on the Idiot Front

Well, we’ve got a court date. We received his response late last week. Prepared and submitted by his ATTORNEY. BWAHAHAHAHA! Who gets an attorney for a small claims suit of less than $1000??? And the attorney’s office is on the far west side of BIG CITY. The suit will be heard at the courthouse in our county, some 50+ miles to the east of said attorney’s office.

I have no idea how much it cost him to have the attorney draw up the response, but I would guess at least $300. I also don’t know if this attorney plans on attending the court date, but I surely hope that he does. More expenses, plus mileage! LOL! If – on the off chance – we lose, I plan to walk directly across the hall to the Clerk of Court and file an appeal. That will cost me another $85. If we lose the appeal, I’ll be into this for about $225 total. Even if he wins, he’ll end up having almost as much $$ invested in legal representation (BWAHAHAHAHA!) as he would have if he’d just paid the damn body shop bill. Don’t know if I mentioned that the husband already replaced the lens on the taillight ($10). We probably won’t even get it fixed. We’ll just use the $$ to help with tuition this fall. I love the idea of IDIOT helping to pay college tuition.

Best case scenario is that he does indeed lose (just for fun, let’s say after an appeal…) which means he’ll owe $955 for the repair, $225 for our court costs PLUS his attorney (BWAHAHAHAHA!) fees and mileage, which could be 200+ miles if they come to both the initial hearing and appeal. IRS mileage is 56.5 cents per mile so about another $112.

The single downside to this is that the court date is set for the Friday before Memorial Day/Graduation weekend. I’m off that day to get ready for the reception on Saturday and don’t look forward to prettying up for a 9am visit with the judge. But I will. Oh yes, I will.

Yer killin’ me, Smalls!

IDIOT Update!

We received the bill from the Sheriff in the mail yesterday for service of the lawsuit.  It cost $36.47 to have it done.  I forgot about mileage.

A couple of bonuses!  IDIOT’S wife was served at 2:51 in the afternoon – THE SAME DAY I FILED!  You have to lovelovelove small town justice, for so many reasons.  This would explain IDIOT’S call to our insurance that same day.  In light of the fact that IDIOT told the school that Mark threatened to kill his whole family and that he’s a lying sack of shit in general, who knows what he told his wife about the certified letter we sent him or what spin he put on the events of the evening.  My guess is that it was absolutely fictional in an attempt to avoid a spanking or something.

In any case, I wrote the check to the Sheriff this morning and put a cute little smiley face and a heart in the ‘for’ line.

Update on The Idiot

So – we haven’t gotten a bill from the sheriff yet, BUT….on Thursday, we got a call from an adjuster at our insurance company.  She had received a call from THE IDIOT, asking if we’d filed a claim for the damage to our car from the accident, and if we hadn’t, could she see that we did?

Um….listen up, stoopid man.  Couple of points here:

1. NONE OF YOUR FRICKING BUSINESS
2. We only carry liability on the car, so we had no reason to contact our insurance
3. Your stupid insurance decided that Thing 2 was 40% at fault (whatever – Progressive can bite me).  Based on that alone, we could have submitted a claim for $400 but decided that filing suit was oh so much more delicious
4. See #1

He must have been served and panicked a bit and thought we had forgotten to file this with our insurance.  What a moron.

The clock is ticking.  20 working days since we filed ends on May 14.  We’re watching the mail with bated breath every day.  He’s required to send us a copy of whatever response he sends to the court.  It’s a week tomorrow and nothing yet….

Chickie – I also took great delight in the ‘I’m watching you’ action and look forward to finding more opportunities, maybe for the rest of my natural life.  LOL!!!!!

We know The Idiots family very well.  His father is very stern and authoritative and really smart.  I used to serve them at the local restaurant I worked at while Mark finished school.  Pretty good tipper and sort of fun to banter with because he was quick witted.  His mom, on the other hand,  is one of those kind of meek ladies (she sews like nobodies business!) that uses bad grammar all the time.  Double negatives, ain’t got no, misuses words.  Nice enough – and was good friends with my darling mother in law.  I have no doubt that IDIOT’S father married her because he could totally and utterly dominate her, which he does.  There were 2 girls and IDIOT – one of the girls was a stripper – LOCALLY!  LOL! and the other married a biker type and was a tweaker, last I knew.  Of course, she’s about 60 now, so maybe has given that up.  I liked the girls well enough.  They were older than IDIOT and both quit high school.  You know, that stripping career has a limited life – gotta strike while the body/iron is hot and all.  The dad had a small business for many years, HVAC/electrical/plumbing.  He was very good, and expensive for the market.  He did tell me something once that I’ve used over the years.  I asked him if, as a favor to me, he’d donate some labor to our local celebration committee to put in some electrical outlets on the bandstand on the square.  He said no – he had to charge his friends because his enemies wouldn’t do business with him.  Funny.  And true.

No connection with any of the judges in the rural county that we live it, I don’t believe.  I’m so interested to go through this process.  Of course, the optimal result would be that he’d just grow a pair and pay up.

Another Freudian point – IDIOTS wife is about half a chromosome from being a man.  She treats him – in public, who knows how in private – like his dad treated his mom.  You know the type – condescending, rude, barking orders.  Another gossipy bit – I had cause to stop at their home a lot of years ago (something for 4-H, I forget what).  I stepped just into the doorway to wait for her to bring me the form or whatever I was there for.  TOTAL HOARDERS HOUSE.  Piles, paths, mess, boxes.  Not just messy, didn’t get it tidied up over the weekend messy but long term disaster messy.  I know it’s sick, but I’ve enjoyed knowing that over the years of nonsense.  It’s a known fact that this family NEVER invites anyone over, never has gatherings and I know why.

Judge Judy Is My Hero

I filed a law suit in small claims court yesterday.  Cost me $85 filing fee plus $15 which will be billed to us by the County Sheriff for service of the suit to the defendant.  Good grief, I love all these legal terms.  My countless hours watching Judge Judy are REALLY paying off here.

Back in February, an IDIOT adult in our small town rear ended our 18 year old.  Who was driving the old Subaru (think small car) with his full sized pickup sporting a ‘cow catcher’ bumper guard.  You’ve seen them – big chrome tubes that are mounted on the front bumper.  They don’t serve much of any purpose – mostly to make the truck look extra manly.

A little back story – this IDIOT hates our kids.  He’s had opportunities (via 4-H and other activities that his wife and he are involved in) over the years to harass and  bully the boys.  You know this kind of IDIOT.  He calls a kid out, loudly, in a crowd for some kind of infraction – real or imagined.  Makes snide comments, excludes them from stuff going on in meetings and generally acts like an ass.  He went to school with the husband, but was 5 or 6 years younger and showed IDIOT tendencies even then.

Anyway, we told both boys to just ignore him.  Don’t respond, don’t talk back, and certainly don’t do anything physical (that included the plan we thwarted re: letting the air out of his tires every chance they got).  He is an IDIOT and they would encounter IDIOTS like him all through their life.  This meshed perfectly with the ongoing message of ‘at least half of all the idiot kids you know now will grow up to be idiot adults – they’ll be your co-workers, teachers, bosses, etc.  You have to learn how to ignore them/deal with them because you can’t change them.’

That worked fairly well until one night in February.  Thing 2 had to attend a city council meeting to fulfill a graduation requirement.  It had rained and the gravels were sloppy (remember this – it’s important later) so he drove the old Subaru.  He parked in the ‘lot’ (all of 10 spaces) across from city hall in the first space next to a handicapped space.  He’s sitting in the hall, waiting for meeting to begin and it’s a full house – lots of students, citizens and the regular crowd including the chief of police.  IDIOT works for the city as a maintenance guy.  Just as the meeting is ready to start, IDIOT comes into the meeting and announces in a loud voice ‘THING 2 (of course, he used his name) PARKED IN A HANDICAPPED SPOT!  HE SHOULD GET A TICKET FOR THAT! CHIEF, GO OUT THERE AND WRITE HIM A TICKET!’

More backstory – Thing 2’s beloved aunt who passed away a few years ago was a polio survivor, wore crutches for 60 years and eventually ended up in a wheel chair.  He’s EXTREMELY conscious of those with physical limitations and would never, ever park in a Handicapped spot.

T2 is mortified.  He follows the chief out, with IDIOT going out with them, for some reason.  Of course, he has NOT parked in the spot, but the back passenger tire is on the line.  The chief asks T2 to straighten the car out and get the tire off the line.  No ticket, of course.  Chief and IDIOT go back into the hall.  T2 re-parks the car and manages to get (passenger side) within about 1” of the driver side of the vehicle next to him – IDIOT’S truck.  A little passive aggressive?  Yup.  Clever?  Yup.

Meeting concludes and T2 leaves the meeting, followed closely by IDIOT.  IDIOT is incensed at the parking situation and is forced to go into his vehicle from the passenger side, while T2 sits in the car.  HA!  I’m laughing at his bravery.  T2 is a kind, compassionate kid that had reached his limit with this IDIOT.

Here’s where T2 makes a bad choice.  He leaves the lot and is followed very, very closely – like less than 5 ft – by IDIOT.  He gets to the corner where he should turn to come home.  Instead, he proceeds south with the plan of driving extremely slow to further aggravate IDIOT, then turn on the gravel road that leads to IDIOT’S house and drive even slower.  Which he did.  Keep in mind, IDIOT could have passed him any time in the ¾ mile of pavement, but didn’t.

T2 turns on the gravel – which is soft and sloppy from the rain – and proceeds to drive down the center of the gravel road (not uncommon – the shoulders get dangerously soft) and slows down to 5 mph.  Yes, he is intending to piss IDIOT off.  Yes, he should have just turned and come home the regular route.  But I get it.

IDIOT tails him, inches from the back of the Subaru and then – about ¼ of a mile down the road and ¼ of a mile from IDIOTS driveway, bumps the back of the Subaru.  T2 is stunned.  He drives about 50 more feet and stops.  Looks in his rearview and sees IDIOT making a 3 point turn in the road and fleeing the scene.  T2 turns around in a field drive and heads back to town (IDIOT is already nowhere to be seen) and goes to Thing 1s house to ask for advice, which was to go home immediately and tell us every single detail of what happened.  Which he does.

The husband is beyond furious and calls IDIOT (after a few calls to get his cell phone #).  IDIOT is back on the scene with the Count Sheriff.  We head over.  IDIOT is in his truck and never gets out.  He’s told the sheriff that T2 was swerving all over the road (not true – as verified by the tracks on the road) and not allowing him to pass.  All while driving 5 mph (true).  IDIOT clipped the Subaru while tryignt o pass (not true). And T2 is the one that fled the scene (not true – tracks showed his turn around in the drive and the 3pt turn the truck made).  Damage to the Subaru is on the back driver side – paint transfer on the cow catcher of the truck is on the driver side.  Please explain how you’d clip driver side to driver side if you were trying to pass?

T2 explains to the sheriff.  Sheriff asks if we have problems between the families.  Husband explains that IDIOT is a douche bag and this is just the latest in his harassment of our kids.  No tickets are issued – which I found odd, since the person that causes the impact and therefore at fault.  Sheriff advised Husband to not engage IDIOT in conversation.  While the sheriff was in his vehicle writing up the report, Husband walks down the road, under the guise of checking the tracks.  On the way back, he stops at IDIOTS truck and proceeds to use some very salty language to tell him that he is never, ever to speak a word to either of our kids ever again.  Oh, and if he did, Husband would kick his ass.  Did he understand, salty language????!!  Husband said he never turned his head to look at him, just nodded.

The next morning, I get a call from the principal at the high school.  IDIOT has a daughter in T2s grade.  He’s called the principal to say that his daughter is afraid to go to school today because T2′s father has threatened to kill his entire family.  Untrue.  He only threatened to kick IDIOTS ass.  WHO DOES THIS SHIT???  I explained the situation to the principal and he said he’d chat with the daughter – who had somehow overcome her fear and did go to school.  It was the buzz for a day or two, but it was mostly a non-event.

Fast forward to a week or so later – IDIOTS insurance company – Progressive – calls and tells Husband that based on IDIOTS story and no citation issued, they have determined that both parties were equally at fault, so no payment will be made.  We carry only liability on the Subaru.

We got an estimate for repairs – $955.  We sent IDIOT the estimate and a letter via certified mail, advising him that he had until April 15 to either send us or the body shop a check in full to cover the repairs or contact Husband to make arrangement for payments.  If we did not hear from him, we would file suit in Small Claims.

So that’s what I did.  If he doesn’t respond within 20 days, judgment is entered against him to include all court costs and interest.  If he responds and takes responsibility, he has 30 days to make payment.  If he denies the suit, a court date will be set.  When he’s found liable (and I have every confidence that he will), we assumed we’d have to file a lien on his property if he didn’t pay.  But I found out that since he’s a city employee, we could move directly to garnishment.

Doesn’t that have a lovely ring?  It’s almost sick how much I am enjoying this.  Tell me what adult in their right mind REAR ENDS a kids car, flees the scene then lies about the event?  An IDIOT.  I’ve had the opportunity to see him around town a couple of times since all this started.  When we made eye contact, I did the two finger point at my eyes then at him.  I’m watching you, asshole.   Oh, how I would love to take this case to the Judge Judy show….

55 Years Married?

My aunt and uncle (really, my cousins but I’ve always called them aunt and uncle because they’re so much older than me) stopped to see us yesterday.  They live in Pennsylvania and travel around – a lot.

Uncle Don is an interesting sort.  Interesting in an aggravating kind of way.  He had a rough childhood – his father died when he was young, mother was a nut case, 3 siblings and he always felt like the odd one out.  My mom (who was only 10 years older than him) took him under her wing and he became her favorite.  She was good at that – finding the person that needed the extra attention and lavishing it on them.  She was a ‘fixer’.  He spent most summers at the farm with my mom and grandparents.  He went on to marry a not so good woman under the impression that the child she had was his.  It wasn’t.  They divorced, he joined the Navy and send money home to his nutty mother.

Then he met Aunt Marie.  She wasn’t Catholic.  His nutty mother didn’t like her – at all.  Presumably, because she wasn’t Catholic, but the real reason (I think) is because he stopped sending her money when he and Marie got married.

They moved to Michigan.  He got degree after degree (he has 3 – undergrad in education –  masters in Math – doctorate in school administration).  They had twin boys.  The boys are geniuses.  Literally.  They’ve worked for NASA, the CIA, the FBI and now both work for the NSA.  Rocket scientists.  Really.

Uncle Don and Aunt Marie retired and trailed the boys around – Texas, Colorado, Washington DC.  The boys never married – until they did.  One married at 49 and the other at 51.  And Uncle Don hates their wives.  With the heat of a thousand suns.

So…I took he and Aunt Marie out to look at the new barn.  Dave went with us.  Dave and Uncle Don were busy looking at some mechanical thing and Aunt Marie just spilled her guts.  Almost literally.   Dave and Uncle Don went back to the house and we talked and talked.

She’s had all that she can take.  She’s thinking of leaving him.  She wants to move out.  She can’t decide.  She thinks maybe she’s being punished by gawd for something she’s done bad.  She’s afraid.  She’s old.  She’s scared.  She can’t stand it anymore.  She wants to be a part of her boys new lives – INCLUDING THEIR SPOUSES.  (Novel idea).  She cried.  And cried.  And told me more stuff than I could even grasp.  I’d always figured that she’d made her peace with him and they had a balance in the house.  But noooooooo.  Oh, and she’d already talked to the boys and they told her to PACK UP AND MOVE OUT.  They’d also already had mano y mano talks with him about it and he flatly denies that there’s any problems, except that Marie is a little tightly wound.  Which is not the case.

I told her to pack her crap and move into an efficiency apartment in Key West (where one of the boys just moved).  Leave him a letter – because she’d already told me that there was no talking to him – telling him that he had 6 months to get some counseling started to figure out why he’s so off the wall.  If he didn’t want to, she’d just go on with her life.  If he was finally motivated to get this going, she’d come back in 6 months and they’d go to a marriage counselor together.   That the only thing she could control was herself – she had all of the power over HERSELF.  And maybe, just maybe, she’d decide that she could stand it and that she didn’t want to toss it all over the side.  Or maybe she’d figure out that she loved being on her own.  Or maybe BETTER YET she’d be doing him a favor by forcing him to unpack the UHaul of crap he’s been toting around for so long and he’d be happier, too.

She cried some more.  We hugged.  She said she felt old.  She’s 77, trim, bright and walks 5 miles a day.  I asked her what 77 looked like when she was a kid and she said ‘ancient’.  I said ‘well, look at yourself.  It’s not what 77 looks like anymore.’

Blew my ever lovin’ mind.  I’m so glad she talked to me.  It was painfully obvious that she needed to talk to someone.  I told her to call me any time and I’d listen and do whatever I could to help.

So….we’ll see what happens.  I’m still boggled.  Funny, though, how many women in today’s world are finally in a place – usually financial – that allows them to make choices for themselves about how they spend their lives and not be victims.

Pope Emeritus? Gimme a Break.

So – the world is without a pope.  Sort of.  We have a pope emeritus, whatever the hell that means.  I’ve spent entirely too much time reading up on this topic (google search – Pope Resignation Conspiracies) and have a developed a theory about this situation:

• There’s some bad, bad financial stuff that’s going on within the Vatican bank.  Vatican BANK?  Whatever.
• That evil Cardinal Bertone is behind a bunch of what’s been happening.  If one were to believe in the devil, he’d be the most likely candidate.  I think he’s been running everything since Benny was elected (i.e. chosen because he was weak and could be manipulated).  I believe that he’s a bad, bad man.
• There’s a bunch of Vatican sex scandals – and for a change, it probably won’t focus on priests diddling/raping little boys or girls – just waiting to bust wide open.
• I hope what I read about Benny’s chances of being arrested for his role in the cover up of the child abuse scandal is true.  Hope, hope, hope.  I’d pray, but hoping for it is equally as impactful.
• Catholics around the world are going to put their foot down and slam their pocketbooks shut.  The innocence is gone, or should be.

It is the end of the world – the end of the Catholic dominated world.  And it will be a better planet for it.

I’m going to reveal something that I’ve only shared with a very few people in my life.  I was molested by a seminarian at a novitiate near where I grew up.  My parents were supporters of the order and the priests there and we spent many Sunday afternoons at the ‘compound’.  It was a beautiful place located on the bluffs along a river.  The grounds were beautiful, filled with gardens and flowers.  There were lots of buildings, all built in the 1920s in Spanish style – stucco, rounded doorways, etc.  This novice  - or priest in training – was from England.  I’ll never, ever forget his name – Aiden Murray.  He must have been about 19 or 20, had longish Beatle-esque hair and seemed so exotic.  I was 7 or so.  He took me on a walk one afternoon and we went into one of the barns to see some baby kittens.  We saw the kittens, alright.  And he fondled me, beneath my panties.  I was confused and couldn’t figure out what on earth he was doing.  I don’t remember any words being exchanged at all.  He didn’t tell me not to tell, but I didn’t.  We went back to the main hall and I ran to my mom and grabbed her and held on tight.  If my parents ever knew or suspected or discussed it with me, I have no memory of it.  It seems to my child memory that the next time we went back, he was gone.  I remember Mom telling me that he’d decided that he didn’t want to be a priest and had gone home to England.

I’m not saying this dramatically affected my life.  It wasn’t traumatic or violent.  I don’t remember any ‘grooming’.  I do remember being glad that he left and I wouldn’t ever have to see him again.  Sometime not long after, the Novitiate closed and the property sat empty for many years.  I feel a twinge, deep inside, when I read about the child abuse that has gone on for decades.  I was part of that.  A small part, a secret part, but a part of the whole all the same.  Just another statistic.

Vatican Rot, Boy Scouts and Other Rants

• Something big is up with the Pope thing.  Big, big, big.  My spidey senses are on stage 4 alert.  I’ve been reading up on the theories behind his ‘retirement’ (WTF?  The Pope doesn’t retire.)  Conspiracy/end of the world theories abound.  I have my own theory – the ‘end of the world‘ relates not to the end of the physical world – although that nut job in North Korea might ruin the spread – but the end of the world domination by the Catholic church.  And good fricking riddance.  It is one big giant cesspool at the top and the shit is leaking down on the faithful rubes.  Any organization – ESPECIALLY ONE THAT CLAIMS RIGHTS TO THE ONE TRUE CHURCH – that harbors pedophiles, bans contraception, doesn’t recognize women as equals and amasses mind-boggling amounts of assets to serve their own evil purposes (which aren’t, by the way, helping the sick/poor/etc.) needs to be dismantled.  I surely and absolutely hope that this is the case.  I’d even pray for it if I thought for one minute it would make a difference.  But it wouldn’t.  I just keep doing the good works that I can do in my small sphere of this world and make whatever positive impact I can make.  It’s like volunteering in your community – if everyone that could would do a little, no one would have to do a lot.
• Boy Scouts of America won’t lift the ban on gays.  Too divisive.  Here’s a thought, BSA.  Let’s quit worrying about gay people and worry about PEDOPHILES.  How about that, huh???  They suck.  Again, from the top and the feces just keeps trickling down.
• Ok – I say bring on the sequester budget cuts.  BRING IT.  Let’s get this over with and quit the nonsensical posturing.  Marco Rubio?  Not a word comes out of your mouth that isn’t scripted with design on running for office in 2016.  Not. One.Word.  Someone has their hand up your Hispanic shirt and is running your mouth.  Shame on you.
• Gun control?  Listen – 99.99% of all of the guns in the US will never, ever be used to kill another person.  The pompous asses at the NRA really missed a prime chance to rebrand themselves as an organization that cares about PEOPLE, not just nuts.  It’s not about the guns.  It’s about responsible gun ownership.  LOCK THEM UP.  Don’t brag about them and brandish them about (like the neighbor of the guy that shot those people at the mall – he was showing off the gun then the shooter broke into his house shortly after and found it in a closet.  Loaded.)  Keep them away from crazy people, including your crazy family members.  The ACLU will scream bloody murder, but maybe – just maybe – you should have psychological clearance to own guns.  And every single gun sale requires a criminal and psychological background check.  In every instance of these recent mass killings, there were people who knew something was wrong with the shooter.  The freak that killed the bus driver and kept that little boy hostage?  I saw interview after interview with people who knew him that said they weren’t surprised – they knew something bad was bound to happen.  WTF??   And the first time W@lMart or any other vendor violates the background check law, their ability to peddle weapons of destruction is gone.  Finito. Forever.  All stores in a chain.  Under any name.  You’re done.  I personally don’t like guns.  They’re designed to kill people.  I’m not about killing people.  But I get the concept of the right to own them.  I don’t understand the need or desire to own semiautomatic assault weapons.  Seriously, the tired argument about defending ourselves against the government?  Really?  Do the government conspiracy theorists truly believe that a few guns in the hands of people who really don’t know how to use them in a combat situation is going to prevent large-scale military take over?  Get over it.
• I’m sorry for all the people who live on the coasts that have their lives ripped apart by storms like Hurricane Sandy.  News flash – there’s going to be more of them.  Global warming, regardless of cause, is a reality.  If you rebuild, you’ll have to do it again.  And again.  And again.
• See above for reasons why all nuclear facilities in coastal areas should be shut down immediately.
• The president doesn’t control gas prices, unless his name is Bush.  China is going to start controlling gas prices via demand.  We’ve done everything we could over the last few generations to turn them into a middle class consumer society.  It’s working.  Now they want cars.  Eventually, all 1.3b of them will have them, and a second junker car for their 16-year-old.  We’re screwed.
• Crazy brother of mine?  You’re still crazy, so no.  I’m not interested in reconnecting.  Quit trying to work on our father to intercede for you.  I’m rapidly approaching a tipping point where I will be forced to do something.  I’m sick of it.   Leave me and mine alone.

Sometimes I just have to get this stuff off of my chest.  I feel better.