Is Santa Real?

05 Dec 2011 1 Comment

by jeanniekay in Uncategorized

It’s the question every parent (who perpetuates this particular myth with their children) dreads.  When our oldest son was still a borderline ‘believer’, I practically got heart palpitations thinking about what I would tell him when the day came.  I waffled between several responses, all of them fairly lame, most of them I thought too deep for a 9 year old to understand without lots more confusing explanation.  I did what I think many (most?) parents do – I told him the same thing my mom told me, that Santa came as long as you believed in him.  He was a smart kid, smart enough to know that the answer was purposefully vague, but he also knew better than to rock that particular boat TOO much.

He was about 9 years old when the day came that he really wanted the truth.  I remember it like it was yesterday.  Sometime before Christmas, he came to me while I was working in the kitchen and said ‘Mom, I want to ask you something’.

‘Is Santa real?’

I looked him right in the eyes and asked if he wanted the real, whole truth.  Yes, he said.  He did.

I told him that Santa didn’t come on Christmas eve, to everyone’s house, in a sleigh with reindeer.  Dad and I were Santa.  But Santa was just another word for love and giving.  We loved him very, very much.  We were Santa, just like his Grandmas and Grandpas had been Santa for Dad and me.

He was and still isn’t an outwardly emotional boy.  Even as a child, he was very pragmatic.  He accepted things he couldn’t change with a shrug and went on to something else.  He rarely cried unless he was in pain.

But not that day.  He burst into tears, sobbing like his heart was breaking.

‘I knew it!  I knew it!  Kids never get any of the toys that you see the elves making on TV!  I was afraid to ask you because you told me when I stopped believing, he’d stop coming’.

Note:  This was a genuine concern.  While the boys believed in Santa (at least one of them), we never put gifts for them under the tree.  All of their presents came from Mr. Claus.

It made me laugh then and makes me laugh still.  I crouched down and put my arm around him and told him that he had a little brother that was only 2.  Even though HE was a big boy who knew that Santa was Mom and Dad, his little brother didn’t know and wasn’t it fun to believe?  As long as David believed, Santa would come.  When he quit believing, Danny would be 15 or so.  That would be plenty long for Santa, wouldn’t it?  From then on, all of their presents would be under the tree.

He sniffed a few times and said ‘We have to keep Santa coming for David.  Every little kid needs to believe in something.’

Then he looked up and said ‘I suppose the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy are you and Dad, too, huh?’

I said yes, we were, but this was our secret for a few more years anyway.  That year on Christmas morning, amid all of the tearing of paper and excitement, he looked over at me and gave me a big wink and a nod.  I would give a million dollars for a picture of that face.

 

 

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